It’s been so long since I have wrote a blog entry, since then a lot has changed... I moved clear across the country, in an attempt to pull myself out of the tomb I found myself in, waiting for my husband to come home... It was a sound decision. I am now living in his home state, a place we spent visiting often throughout the years. I’m doing much better now. After a brief attempt at taking my own life, I got help.
I know in my last entry I said I wanted to love again, I thought I did. I thought I loved the last person I tried having a relationship with, now I realize I never really did. I was just searching for a feeling, a feeling to help remind me I’m alive. Now I don’t need that in my life, nor do I want it. Truth be told, no one could ever love me the way that my Brian did... No one! Nor could I love them that way either...
Brian made me feel as though I were the only woman in the world. The way he would look at me with such love, such admiration, and adoration. Who loves someone so much that they will watch them for hours, waiting in line, just to see them work? I find myself drifting off getting lost in his eyes as though he were here in front of me... kissing me, touching me, loving me. I honestly wouldn’t even welcome anyone to even try, because they would never compare. I’m in love with my husband, every single day until the day I die—he is my one and only, forever.
